Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Brad Tag

Little Box tagged me. I've never been tagged. I suppose I should be a good sport and answer the questions, even though I've never been cooperative about anything.

Ten years ago: I finally graduated from cooking school after having been put on academic probation twice.

Five years ago: I was a fry-chef at a tavern in a raucous college town in Maryland. When I wasn't working as a chef, I was playing guitar in a local band called Muckraker Bob. We had an indie-hit on the college radio station. Do you remember, "Rock/Paper/Scissors/Dirty-Sock?" That was our song.

One year ago: I took a road-trip across the United States. For some reason, I wasn’t allowed to drive. Nonetheless, I took over the wheel in New Mexico. There were a few mishaps here and there, and the car ended up dying on the on-ramp in Medford, Oregon.

Yesterday: I invented a soufflé that turns itself inside out when you hold a flame over it. Unfortunately, Brutus ate it before I could take a picture.

Five snacks: cheddar bunnies, butternut squash, chocolate milkshakes, guacamole, fried green tomatoes.

Five things I would do with a million dollars: Buy five really big turnips and sell them at a profit.

Five places to which I would run away: under the couch, behind the curtains, inside the hanging fruit basket, on top of the pantry, beside the vaccuum cleaner.

Five things I would never wear: a sensible hat, a sensible scarf, a sensible coat, warm mittens knitted by my landlady, scratchy woolen underwear

Five favorite tv shows: I’ve not watched television since I threw the box out the window years ago. I used to be a fan of The Dukes of Hazard, Wonder Woman (especially the show highlighting my guest appearance as Gorilla Grodd), Battlestar Galactica, Knight Rider, and V. What's good these days?

Five greatest joys: smoking Havana banana cigars, sleeping under shady trees, cooking, terrorizing the cats, grooming

Five favorite toys: I’m too old and mature to play with toys. Any rumors to the contrary involving my landlord’s daughter’s stacking blocks, dollhouse, Fisher Price record player, tricycle, or musical rocking chair is a conspiracy to undermine my dignity.

Five people I’m tagging: Why limit it to five? I’m tagging the whole world! Ergo, if you read this, consider yourself tagged.


LB said...

Must, I repeat Must have pictures of 5 places you would run away to!

PS: Your word verifier was hard this time.

Lady K said...

Think you could re-create that souffle`? I'd almost pay to see a picture or better yet, a video of it turning itself inside out...

Brad the Gorilla said...

Lady Hearteater, how much would you be willing to pay? Nevermind, I have decided to work on a creation even more profound than the souffle. The souffle I made yesterday is so yesterday.

Cute Little Box, I'll see what I can do. Of course, now that the world knows the five places to which I'd run away, I'll have to find five more places. This time, I'll keep them secret.

Lady K said...

Brad, I'm LOST. I had a major fish fiasco over the weekend. Wanted to make salmon with lemon/dill sauce and blew it MAJOR. I opted for grilled cheese, it was SO BAD. Any suggestions? BTW, if you get any cuter I'd have to come up there and make you my infamous pizza...

HitManJ said...

I was going to tell you all about the great hit shows on television today, then I realized they all suck. If I weren't so damnded addicted to Futurama and Family Guy, I'd throw my box at the next pickup that drives by (which is like every 3.2 seconds.


Brad the Gorilla said...

Lady Hearteater,
Grilled cheese sounds better than salmon with dill sauce. How about grilled cheese with dill sauce? Now that would be a sandwich over which I'd pound my chest with anticipation.

It's good to know that I'm not missing anything by not watching the television. I want to see the new "Battlestar Galactica," though I'm disappointed that they changed Starbuck from a human male to a human female. I was hoping that they'd find a talented orangutan instead. (You thought I was going to say gorilla.)