I have been thrust into solitary confinement for the remainder of the New York trip. What an "UNSPEAKABLE OUTRAGE," as Owen Meany would say. When we arrived in Yonkers, the proprietress said that I could stay in the toy-room and sleep in the doll crib. A doll crib!
"This is impossible," I said.
"I am a 452 lb gorilla," I said.
"There is no way I would fit in this room. It would be better to fit me in the living room near the television," I said.
There was some muttering about how dangerous it was to put me in the same room as a television, and then I found myself sitting in the toyroom, facing a Victorian dollhouse. Well, I did what any gorilla would do in a similar situation: I threw a fit! Then, I played with the dollies and pushed them in their little perambulators. At first, Lucia was allowed to visit me for several hours a day, but after she was found to have pulled all of the miniature pictures off of the dollhouse walls as well as plucked every flower from its plastic stem, the proprietress deemed me a Bad Influence. Then, she locked the door.
Tomorrow, the House of Glee sets forth for Seattle on a slow-moving train. They have threatened to check me with the baggage, but I know in the end, Lucia will come to my defense. She's already promised to sneak me some strawberry-rhubarb pie after everyone's gone to bed. Bravo, Lucia! You are a beacon of sanity in a world of craziness.